wishful thinking
by xx.aesthetic
Summary: 01 -- Naruto wants to have more sex than Sasuke. Seriously.


Authoress' Note: No, I don't know what I was thinking… Yes, I'm a bad authoress. Sorry.

**Pairings**: SasuNaru friendship, peripheral SasuSaku, NaruHina  
**Rating**: T for cursing  
**Warning:** OOC, sorta sociable!Sasuke

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. It's only for my shameless _pimpin_'

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**wishful thinking**

Sasuke was smiling, or doing whatever he _considered_ smiling—a certain type of egotistical, haughty smirk that made him look a whole lot more ugly than normal.

So as sweetly as Naruto could, he inquired about his friend's uncommon… _cheerfulness_. "_Yeah_, and why are _you_ so happy?" He squinted his eyes.

The other boy's smirk only widened considerably, and Naruto briefly wondered if he would suffocate under Sasuke's own undeserved smugness. He tipped his head backward to glance at the _poor, poor sap_.

"Trust me," Did he just _laugh? _"You wouldn't understand, even if I told you."

"Then you wouldn't mind telling me, would you, bastard?"

Sasuke's stance went from amused to serious in a split second. He glanced down at his hand, deep in contemplation. "Well, put simply," another giddy smirk inched onto his face, "Sakura and I… We did it."

What?!

…

Oh.

…_Oh_.

As realization dawned on Naruto, he screamed and broke into a rosy blush on Sakura's behalf. "What the _hell_ is wrong with you? You _pervert_! You don't go around… _showboating_ about that kinda thing!"

Sasuke scoffed; since when had _Naruto_ of all people become the modest one? "Like you're one to talk. You're only freaking out because you've never done it before," he chuckled, mostly in pity of Naruto. "You n00b."

Naruto seemed taken aback at the insult. "_N00b_?! Ha! If I wanted to do it, I'd be ten-times better at it than you, bastard! I bet she didn't even _enjoy_ it!"

"Whatever you say," he mumbled indignantly before turning away from Naruto. "Not like you'd be able to prove it, anyway."

Naruto pointed an offended finger at the unmoved male. "Uh huh! Just watch! I'll do it with the _next_ girl that walk past!"

Secretly, he wished to take on the same dumb dreamy-smiley look that Sasuke had. So it was necessary that he get laid.

Yeah.

"Idiot, you can't just go around doing it with anybody," he explained flatly. "Then you'd be known as Konoha's man whore, and you'd begin to chafe."

He wasn't phased by the bastard's attempt to discouraged him. Sasuke was so _stupid_; the hell did _chafing_ have to do with anything?

"Yeah, yeah, just another half-assed attempt to bring me down! I bet I'll get more than _you_ before this day is over with!"

Sasuke really should have talked some common sense into the boisterous blonde idiot, but then he decided against it. After all, he was up for some afternoon entertainment. "Fine, Naruto," he said a bit _too_ encouragingly, "Go right ahead."

"Right!"

Naruto stood from his stool with whatever type of crackpot confidence he possessed. Shoulders held high, he marched out of the small shop with Sasuke's (_bastardly_) onyx eyes still glued to his back.

Keh! Who did Sasuke think he was? Like it was actually _that_ hard to—

Naruto paused in his energetic stride when he bumped into something _small and soft_. With boobs.

He raised a blonde eyebrow and peered down at when he recognized as Hyuuga Hinata. Petite Hyuuga Hinata, who was only 4'10 compared to his 5'9" stance. She just barely reached his chin.

Reality suddenly struck him though, and with her height temporary forgotten, he mused that hey, she had _boobs_, and that meant that she was a _chick_. Which meant that he was one step closer to defeating bastard-kun.

He began, "Oh, it's convenient ruining into you here, Hinata…" but then stopped. How was he supposed to go about doing this, exactly? Was he just supposed to… er, just come out and ask her?

Yes, he decided, he was going to be straightforward with her and just ask. He squinted down at a cowering Hinata whose cheeks were flushed a dark red.

Clearing his throat, Naruto explained, "You see, I need you for something, Hinata. And um, I don't know if you'll want to help… But," he laughed loudly and nervously, "It's worth a try, right?"

Without over thinking a reaction, she could only faintly nod.

"So um…here I go…" Taking both his hands, he placed them on both sides of Hinata's face. Her eyes widening, she found it impossible to speak, much less move. In a second and a half, Naruto had pulled her close into a fleeting kiss.

Her arms hung loosely at her sides because _oh my God, Naruto is kissing me and I only went to the supermarket for some groceries and Oh my God he's kissing me…!_

Her stomach erupted in frantic butterflies, and before she knew it, everything went black.

Naruto pulled away when he felt her slump in his grasp. "Hinata…? Are you okay?"

Was that _it_?

_That_ was sex?

Frowning, Naruto marched back into the small ramen shop with a unconscious Hinata in tow. "Bastard, I sexed her and she fainted! How the hell could something like _this_ make you so happy?!"

Sasuke only smirked at his friend's naivety.

_Idiot._

_

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Authoress' Note: Naruto's not that stupid in reality, but I made him like that in this fic.

He's quite adorable, actually. :3

Anyways, I wanted to do a ficlet collection thingy with all Naruto characters! Yay! And who is the boss of it…?

YOU. I'm officially doing requests.

Review/PM in the following format:

Prompts:  
Characters:  
Genre:

Hehe. I've wanted to do tiny requests for forever! The guidelines? Not many. :D

It doesn't have to be just romance. I'll do bromance/family/friendship, WHATEVER. All ya gotta do is ask.

My only exception is that I won't be liberal when it comes to ShikaIno and SasuSaku for romance. If you want any of the afore mentioned characters to be **romantically** involved with anyone, is has to be with each other. Sorry.

Request away, lovelies. :)


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